


Series B(DSM)

by sierra_roe



Series: Bream on BDSM [2]
Category: Silicon Valley (TV)
Genre: Aftercare, Flogging, Fluff, Gen, Humor, Light BDSM, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Platonic BDSM, Podcast, Possibly Pre-Slash, jared is super into consent, service top jared, this is the most wholesome thing i've ever written
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-11
Updated: 2020-02-11
Packaged: 2021-02-27 19:21:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,169
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22660933
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sierra_roe/pseuds/sierra_roe
Summary: Laurie agrees to give Pied Piper their Series B funding, but on one condition. Richard needs to go on her kink podcast. So of course, he has to get some experience first, and Jared is more than happy to help out...Loosely connected to the first fic in this series, but also works as a standalone.
Relationships: Jared Dunn/Richard Hendricks
Series: Bream on BDSM [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1630285
Comments: 6
Kudos: 11





	Series B(DSM)

The team is on edge. They handed over their numbers to Bream-Hall a few days ago, and now, there’s nothing left to do but wait for the decision about their Series B funding. Finally, Richard gets a text from Monica saying that she wants to meet with him.

The next day finds her standing in Richard’s office, looking uncomfortable. “So, here’s the thing,” she says, “Laurie's ready to give you the Series B, but there’s a condition attached…”

“She is? Wow, that’s great!” Richard gulps, "Well, but what’s the condition?” 

“Before I tell you this, I want you to know that I tried my best to talk her out of it, but you know Laurie.”

Richard jerks his head to the side nervously, and attempts to crack a joke, “Well, what is it? Don’t give me Series B blue balls here.” As soon as it leaves his mouth he looks like he wants to take it back. 

Fortunately, Monica is used to this kind of thing from Richard by now, and ignores it. She steels herself for the news she has to deliver, then grimaces as she says, “She wants you to go on her podcast.”

“Her podcast? Wait, you mean that Bream on BDSM thing?”

“Alright, well, I’m surprised you already know about it, but at least that’s one less thing I have to explain. I know it’s super weird but yes, she wants you on Bream on BDSM.”

> _Bream on BDSM | Ep 106 | 00:45:66 – 00:47:02_
> 
> **Laurie:** And in summation, I recommend a cautious “buy” on the Ultimate Leather Blinder and Bit Set and a “don’t buy” on the JD’s Xtreme Pony Hobbles. 
> 
> **Laurie:** In other news, recently, a viral tweet the content of which reads, “Jira for your polycule,“ has been making the proverbial rounds. I have been informed was a “joke,” however, in this segment I wish to delve into implications and strategies for using Atlassian’s aforementioned project management tool to structure your polyamorous relationship, colloquially known as a “polycule.”
> 
> **Laurie (off-mic):** Polycule... I find this word … distasteful. Monica, please ensure that in the future we minimize the usage of such fictional portmanteaus on the podcast. 

When Monica leaves, Richard pulls Jared aside. “Jared, you have to help me out!” he whispers, taking care that no one else can hear him. He can only imagine the ribbing that’s sure to follow if Gilfoyle and Dinesh ever hear of this. “Laurie wants me on her BDSM podcast. It’s the only way we’ll be able to get our Series B.”

“Richard, you know I’m here for you. What can I do to help?”

Richard starts fidgeting uncomfortably. “Look, I don’t know anything about BDSM, not really, other than like, what we saw at Folsom. Uh, so, I was hoping, uh, that you would, um…”

“Richard, would you like to help me give you some experience? So you have something to talk about with Laurie?”

Richard is visibly relieved that Jared figured out what he meant without having to actually say the words himself. He’s also nervous about what he’s signing himself up for. “Yes, um, yes, that’s what I meant. Thank you Jared… and I know I can count on you to keep this on the downlow, right?”

“Well, of course, Richard, but you know that once she publishes the podcast, everyone will know, right?”

“Yes, but, we’ll have our Series B then, so it won’t matter. And I’ll... I’ll deal with that when it happens. I guess.” Truthfully, Richard wasn't thinking that far into the future. All he could think about was making sure that Pied Piper got their Series B. 

> _Bream on BDSM | Ep 153 | 00:21:48 – 00:23:12_
> 
> **Laurie:** According to the results of my annual listener survey, the most popular safeword amongst Bream on BDSM listeners was EBITDA, followed closely by AMEA and NAV. It is yet unknown why acronym-based safewords are so popular with my listeners. Perhaps I will add a relevant question to next year’s survey. 
> 
> **Laurie:** And now, it is time for a sponsor break, after which, we will welcome another guest to the podcast. 
> 
> _Sponsor break intro music_
> 
> **Laurie:** With State Line Tack, get the best assortment of quality horse products and accessories at an affordable price, for dressage, jumping, eventing, and much more...
> 
> **Laurie:** I believe there has been a mistake. This appears to be a sponsor script for a non-human equine retailer. My apologies, listeners. 
> 
> **Laurie (off-mic):** Monica! Monica, you must double check my podcast sponsors and inform them of our content to ensure this does not happen in the future! Monica! Where are you going?
> 
> _Sponsor break end music_
> 
> **Laurie:** Welcome back. Today I have with me Jesse James Ferret. We will be speaking about applying user-centered design thinking to kink negotiations.

So that’s how they find themselves in Jared’s condo, with Jared holding a flogger that he’s procured from somewhere. 

“Uh, hope you’re gonna submit an expense report for that.” Richard jokes nervously when he sees it. 

Jared smiles at him in a reassuring way. “I’ve watched a few tutorials so I won’t be going into this completely blind. Before we get started, I wanted to ask you some questions so that I know what you’re okay with.” He picks up a pen and pulls out a checklist that he’s printed out from some website. 

Richard covers his face with his hands. “I can’t deal with this. Just do whatever.”

Jared looks concerned. “Consent is important, and I don’t want to cross any of your limits because I don’t know about them. Let’s just do a few questions. So, I’m going to plan on hitting you on your backside. Are you okay with that?”

Richard keeps his hands over his face, “Ugh, yes.”

“Thank you. And would you prefer to have your pants on or off?”

Richard briefly considers having them off, then gives himself a reality check. “On! On, of course. Look, can we just get started already?”

Jared signs and puts down his checklist. He’d barely even gotten a chance to get to any of the questions. “Alright. If you don’t mind, please lean over the couch, Richard, and we’ll get started."

Richard kneels in front of the couch and puts his face down on it. He notices that Jared’s couch smells much better than any piece of furniture at Erlich’s place ever did. In fact, Jared has lit some nice vanilla-smelling candles for the occasion that cast a warm glow over the room.

> _Bream on BDSM | Ep 172 | 00:50:08 – 00:58:44_
> 
> **Gilfoyle:** Blood, scat, sex work, hypnosis, piss, human body parts, marijuana even in states where it’s legal...
> 
> **Dinesh:** What is that, your satanic ritual shopping list?
> 
> **Gilfoyle:** It’s a list of the things conventional payment processors won’t touch. Therefore, making crypto the superior currency option.
> 
> **Laurie:** Now, as I understand it, you two are not, in fact, a couple?
> 
> **Gilfoyle:** We are not.
> 
> **Laurie:** Perhaps you could elaborate on what it is like to work closely with someone when everyone else believes you to be a couple.
> 
> **Gilfoyle:** To be honest, I’m not sure what Dinesh is doing here at all.
> 
> **Dinesh:** Gilfoyle! You know I'm here for moral support!
> 
> **Laurie:** Indeed. Back to the topic of cryptocurrency, Gilfoyle, tell us more about the outlook of crypto on kink businesses in the coming fiscal year. 
> 
> **Gilfoyle:** The outlook is not good.
> 
> **Laurie:** Indeed. As you know, crypto hasn’t reached widespread adoption nor is it projected to in the foreseeable future, other than as an alternative investment vehicle...
> 
> **Gilfoyle:** Right, meaning that kink businesses generally can’t really get big...
> 
> **Laurie:** As VC firms aren’t able to finance them.
> 
> **Gilfoyle:** I worked for Fetlife until Baku fired me over a disagreement about crypto as a primary revenue model... wait, can we cut that part?

“Alright Richard, I’m going to flog you now. Are you okay with that?”

“Yes, just fucking do it, already, Jared!” Richard says from the couch. 

Jared pulls his arm back and swings the flogger, landing it firmly and precisely on Richard’s ass. He wasn’t lying about having watched some tutorials. Although he was a little too embarrassed to mention it to Richard, he’d also practiced his aim on a pillow before Richard came over. Richard gasps in shock and rises up from the couch.

“Oh! I’m sorry, was that too hard?” Jared asks him in alarm.

“No, it’s fine, I’m just not used to it. You can do it again.” Richard says, putting his head back down on the couch. 

Jared raises the flogger and strikes Richard’s ass solidly two times in a row. Seeing that Richard isn’t complaining, he does it again. 

“This is okay now, right Richard?”

Richard nods but doesn’t say anything. Jared tentatively rests his left hand on Richard’s upper back as he continues to hit his ass with the flogger. Richard reaches up and places his hand over Jared’s, holding it in place. Jared draws a slight intake of breath, then returns to flogging Richard, picking up his speed as he sees that Richard is beginning to relax into the sensation. He continues as Richard starts to breathe harder. Jared considers asking again if Richard is doing okay, but if he’s being honest with himself, he’s memorized his friend’s facial expressions well enough that he doesn’t really need the verbal confirmation to know. Even though he’s never seen Richard quite like this before, he can tell that he's starting to enjoy himself a little, in spite of himself. Richard moans quietly, then glances up at Jared to see if he noticed. 

“It’s okay. Whatever reaction you have, it’s the right one.” Jared gives his hand a squeeze and resumes his flogging. He likes hearing Richard make these new sounds. 

> _Bream on BDSM | Ep 165 | 00:05:35 – 00:09:08_
> 
> **Laurie:** Today I am pleased to welcome, both from Pied Piper, Richard Hendricks and Jared Dunn. 
> 
> **Jared:** Thank you Laurie. We're both very happy to be here. Aren’t we, Richard?
> 
> **Richard:** Uh, mmhm. Yeah. Definitely, uh, happy to be here. 
> 
> **Laurie:** Now, I understand that you are both first timers, both to kink, and to Folsom, where we recently crossed paths. 
> 
> **Jared:** Yes! We went there to headhunt for new hires, one thing led to another, and well, here we are!
> 
> **Laurie:** Setting aside the question of why you found it advisable to try to recruit employees at a kink festival, I would like you to tell us more about your first kink experiences. 
> 
> **Jared:** Well, it was really quite touching. Richard wanted to see what it was like to be flogged, and I’m flattered to say that he asked me to do the honors. 
> 
> **Laurie:** Mm, yes, quite. And Richard, how did you find your first experience?
> 
> **Richard:** [Gulping]
> 
> **Jared:** Our champ here did great.
> 
> **Richard:** Jared, I don’t – Well, I can say that it was an interesting and new experience and I definitely learned something. 
> 
> **Laurie:** Please elaborate, Richard. 
> 
> **Jared:** Oh! Richard’s leaving. I’m sure it’s nothing. He certainly isn’t vomiting into a trash can or anything like that. I can give you details, Laurie. I would say that it was a learning experience for both of us and we both came out the other side the better for it. 

Jared continues to flog him as the sounds that Richard’s making gradually get louder. Finally, the noises cross over from pleasure to actual pain and Jared stops, and slides himself onto the couch next to Richard. 

“How are you feeling?” he asks.

Richard has stayed where he is, still kneeling and half on the couch. He looks slightly dazed, and limp. He looks up at Jared. “I finally feel empty. It feels amazing, actually.” He swings his legs up onto the couch, and slides around, laying his head in Jared’s lap without really thinking about it. A flash of realization crosses his face and he almost asks Jared if what he’s doing is okay, but looking up, he sees that it’s clearly fine with Jared, so he stays silent. Jared places a soft hand on his head and begins to stroke his hair. Richard closes his eyes. “That feels nice.”

“Did you like being flogged?” Jared asks quietly.

“Actually… yeah. You know, I hate to admit it, but I think Laurie was right. It felt, like, I don’t know, relieving, not having to worry about anything and just letting you hit me.”

“Mmm, that’s nice. I’m glad I could provide that for you."

“Is this weird, that we’re being so, I don’t know… intimate?”

“I don’t think so. After all we’ve been through together, all these years of Pied Piper late nights, and putting out fires, doesn’t this feel natural?”

“Yeah, actually, it kind of does.”

“Oh!” Jared straightens up and reaches onto the table next to the couch. “I’ve got some chocolate here! I read online it’s good for aftercare. Would you like a piece?”

**Author's Note:**

> So one time on Fetlife I was talking to this CEO of some tech startup (not a famous or successful one) and he refused to go to a munch with me because he was afraid of being outed about being kinky and not getting funding. But then later I like accidentally doxed him by stumbling across his profile on a (vanilla) dating app where he had mentioned his company name. I went to the about us page of his website and it turned out he had a terrible hairline in his CEO photo, so, bullet dodged I guess. And like, I don’t live in SF but if I did I feel like he would have been more lowkey about going to a public kink event. I mean, I get it, I have a lot of feelings about the concept of my coworkers potentially finding out the weird shit I’m into, but ... I still manage go to events. Anyway this series is me working through some of these feelings, so thank you for coming along on this journey with me and reading this tangentially related anecdote.


End file.
